Matt - 06/10/98 14:04:47
My Email:gware@nor.com.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Howdy
Your ArchNemesis: that guy on the kleen Heat ad
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Thong
Marital Status: not
Sex (M/F/Y/N): male and yes
How did you find out about the Academy?: You told me

Comments:
This is a cool page.

Igor - 06/09/98 21:38:47
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: I haven't only got good hands.....
Your ArchNemesis: Lacey Black
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Come here and I'll show ya. CLOSE UP!!
Marital Status: single (legally) ; married in 63 different hindu villages
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Only the Taiwanese way.......upsidedown!!

Comments:
Greetings NTM, or: yo dude how's it hangin`? I thought you may like to catch up on some reading. I recommend the adventures of Bunky the 3 legged horse and his poor misguided rider Jock. I will have it out in hard back soon, a better weapon than soft back ! See ya later! BUNKY RIDES ON.....

Lacey Black & Igor - 06/08/98 04:01:49
My Email:flasher@underwear.com
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Check this out *Flash*
Your ArchNemesis: Neil
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Sexy Black Lacey Lingerie
Marital Status: Sharing sugary substances is as close as I can get!!
Sex (M/F/Y/N): we're here we are together and we are waiting
How did you find out about the Academy?: Igor knows the way, blindfolded!!

Comments:
Greetings NTM, Lovely day for Kinky sex!!HAHAHA Just so you know Katie B's alias' are Pink, Katie Straighty and now Lacey Black. Her vices are many things including the "is it low enough for you" shirt. Her undying love for Kitley, Warrell, Simon, Paul Firman, you, Stephen Bell (sorry, Igor just took o er!) I already told you her most memorable moments, last email!! But for the most memorable moment of her life: Getting oh-so close to Simon at a disco last year!! ha ha ha. That is something we would all rather forget I think!! (Igor: But I'm a constant remin er of that!!) Remember: it IS a great day for KINKY sex and Katie will be home ALL DAY!!! ha ha ha

Igor - 06/07/98 10:45:32
My Email:spice@upyourlife.now
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: If my dog had a face that ugly I'd shave it's butt and make it walk backwards
Your ArchNemesis: Anyone who likes pink (see ya later Katie!!)
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Kitley. (Maybe he's just my favourite weapon!!) KINKY!!
Marital Status: For you, single. If Blinky's asking, definately TAKEN.
Sex (M/F/Y/N): If it's not on, it's not on!!
How did you find out about the Academy?: It was stuck to the lid of my coffin with an ice pick. Yes, strangely enough, it was!!

Comments:
NTM, what can I say. A hell of alot!! Ha! Igor had a rush in me last time I wrote and claimed she was actually a he! ha ha ha *shut up real self* I'm sorry, my multiple personalities are having a major clash at the moment- perhaps Posh has been singing To Much! Ha, double meaning!! Yes, it has been revealed Igor is actually a he! Due to an ancient hindu religious tie he was forced to assume the role of the opposite sex for a few thousand years. Unfortunately that time is drawing to a close so it may be go d bye to sexy Igor in a very short time *sigh* and in with the masculine version. This is getting wierd- I'm leaving. (One position left!!) Be quick!! :)

And people say I'm deranged and have multiple personalities. No they don't. Who asked you? Shut up.
I.G.O.R Ignoramous, galoot, orbiting, repugnant - 06/07/98 02:06:21
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: I'm going out with Kitley- SUCKED IN!!
Your ArchNemesis: Mr Beard (VB MAN)
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: intelligence, looks, wit, physique........
Sex (M/F/Y/N): I'm waiting

Comments:
NTM, the friends page is so cool!!! Ha ha ha ha ha , I laugh till I stop. I loved it. I have a memorable moment for Katie: flashing us her black lacey singlet thing with nothing underneath it, on Saturday night, subsequently blinding Kristy and Myself for approx. 3 hours. Very disgusting sight, and I do not recommend it!! Anyway, the friends page is fabulous- but you know what I truly like.........!! However, as yet there is no mention of Igor in the Tales Of NTM. Please, please, next update- refer to his yes his) immense power over the female race and subsequent turning-into-a-female stage of his upbringing. As the legend goes Igor will one day return to his normal sex. (Hopefully not to soon or this wonderful dream life will be done for!!) See ya!!

Uh...yeah, I'll do that..
Igor - 06/07/98 01:35:46
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: love me, love the spice girls
Your ArchNemesis: a female mesapotamian camel dung merchant
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: microscopic horse dung
Marital Status: one position left
Sex (M/F/Y/N): I have a headache

Comments:
Well Aidan, actually, to get the position you need to pass a fitness test and go through rigorous personal interviews be able to follow simple commands like: exterminate the whole of the American race with a toothpick and a cat's hair ball. But, since you are a friend, arrangements could be made............perhaps. Updates are cool- keep `em coming. (But I havn't been to the friends page yet, maybe I shouldn't be quick to praise!!)

Hey! I'd exterminate the human race for less than that.And believe me, once you've read the friend's page you'll be licking my boots.

Comments:
That's two updates in a row. Looking pretty snazzy. Keep those hits coming folks!

I.G.O.R. indesputably gorgeous orgasmic recluse - 06/05/98 11:23:10
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: the first time's free........
Your ArchNemesis: B.L.I.N.K.Y. blind, lumpy, iliacal, nincompoopical, krazy, yodlehead
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: it's hidden beneath my scalp
Marital Status: married in 46 different countries to approx. 365 guys- one for everyday of the year!! Except for the leap years so there's a position left.......
Sex (M/F/Y/N): every day

Comments:
Oh my gosh, everything's red!! Or maybe I'm still looking at the world through rose coloured glasses, I'm not sure. Well Aidan, one spot left, you'd better be quick!! Sleep well my feathered friend. (I may be wrong about the feathered bit)

A position left? Cool! How do I apply? Is there forms I have to fill in? I hate forms. - A.I.D.A.N. (Amazingly Intelligent, Dangerous and Narcisstic)
Jimbo - 06/05/98 07:44:02
My URL:http://I'm not sure
My Email:james1@key.net.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Isn't it huge
Your ArchNemesis: Vaseline
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Homosexuality poison gas
Marital Status: Why bother
Sex (M/F/Y/N): If your offering
How did you find out about the Academy?: I have a link to it

Comments:
The music is much better than Blinkys, though this heshian bakground is crap. All up there is very little pornography here, so go get some!

Jimbo I am NOT putting any naked men on this page so you'll have to find sexual gratification elsewhere. By the way your crap page's address is http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Maze/2139/
Igor - 06/05/98 06:34:14
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: I'm itchy
Your ArchNemesis: Anyone sexier than me (although I've never come across one!!)
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: bend over & I'll show you
Marital Status: Are you proposing??
Sex (M/F/Y/N): call me: 6642430909

Comments:
Hi NTM. I want to be on the friends page!! Let me refresh your memory. I'm a part time supermodel, 6 foot, platinum blond, skinny, sexy, chick. And then I wake up!!! ha ha ha. I want to see Igor on these pages soon, ok. Hey, in reply to your other comment I know what would make you happy and I'm home tonight- or do you prefer males????!!!

Alright, Alright I'll put Igor on the one of the pages soon.Oh and yeah baby, That would make me happy indeed if we (insert action here) but I feel somehow Kitley would ignore me for the rest of his life. *sigh* oh well
Mr Sexy - 06/04/98 09:16:04
My URL:http://wwww.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Arena/4721/
My Email:bourke@key.net.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Is that a condom in your hand, or are you just glad to see me?
Your ArchNemesis: Any sexy 19 yr old
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: car tyres
Marital Status: strictly forbidden
Sex (M/F/Y/N): before marriage
How did you find out about the Academy?: i had to find the worst page on the Internet... and I believe I have found it!

Comments:
Nice frames Aidan, I'm waiting for my abusive response in the friends page! COME ON! Oh... and if you know any extremely sexy 19 year olds, please send them over here! NOW!

There's an even worse page than here. Its at http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Arena/4721/ I believe its called "Welcome to your Pooftatrap". And no 19 yr olds for you. They're mine, all mine!!! *evil laugh*
Igor - 06/04/98 08:07:11
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: ich wohne in ein Maulwurfshugel
Your ArchNemesis: Guru Al
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: baked beans
Marital Status: taken, taken, taken
Sex (M/F/Y/N): gimmie, gimmie

Comments:
Ok, Aidan, I'll give it to you straight. There were no mentions of Guru Al's personal assistants what-so-ever in the writing of the lost extract. I want to see the names Igor and Petera connected somehow, NOW!! Or......you could write something really nic about me on your friends page and all will be forgotten. Alternatively, I will buy you all the Hanson CD's and forcibly make you listen to EVERY SONG!!!!! Ha. So much for contrafibularity my proprioceptionistic friend. Sleep well.

Why I am compunctious with delight at your most gorfond plea for taxomriny. I'll put who I like on which pages. And you know very well what would make me sleep well. :)
Guru Al - 06/04/98 06:57:44
My URL:http://(insert fake address)
My Email:'fraid not
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Hold my Toga, Would You
Your ArchNemesis: Hanson (still)
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Tally ho papers
Marital Status: 78 wives, i have been busy.
Sex (M/F/Y/N): well, i didn't think you saw me that way.
How did you find out about the Academy?: same reason as last time

Comments:
Had tro write in German didn't you Peter. You know it is the language of the devil. Just Kidding. I love all Germans, and so does God. And isn't that all that matters. The answer is no.

God does love Germans but not the French, so if your French and your reading this, become a Hindu. (I hear Brahma just loves your accent!) Oh and Guru Al, you are a git.
Guru Al - 06/04/98 06:47:32
My URL:http://www.guru.com
My Email:n/a
Your ArchNemesis: Hanson
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: finger nails
Marital Status: married 56 times
Sex (M/F/Y/N): m, y
How did you find out about the Academy?: you told me idiot

Comments:
Yes, it is me. The one and only (excluding all imitators) Guru Al. Behold the wisdom of me, truly great i am. Do not feel embarassed if you want to worship me. It is quite alright, everyone else does.

I am sorry my friend, but I'm to busy worshipping another god. (i.e. myself) to even contemplate grovelling at your feet

Igor - 06/03/98 08:41:02
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: I'll do anything for a mandarine!!
Your ArchNemesis: Blinky
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Pink pencil
Sex (M/F/Y/N): now!!!!
How did you find out about the Academy?: you told me you git.

Comments:
Aidan, why can't I get to read Guru Al's lost genesis extract?? It keeps coming up error. And there is no music for me. I am a freak aren't I. I can't help it. Gotta run, stay funny!!

Yes, you ARE a freak, but don't worry so am I. And I'll always be funny :)
Katie B - 06/02/98 09:31:58
My Email:baldwin4@hotkey.net.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Is it low enough for Ya?
Your ArchNemesis: Pauline Hanson
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Hairspray
Marital Status: Single
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Female I think
How did you find out about the Academy?: Der, you told me

Comments:
Well sir, your page has really advance and I am most impressed!! The music is really great!! I don't know how you find the time!! WELL DONE!!!

Tobi~Dawne aka Lily aka TheCryingRain - 06/02/98 02:31:34
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Parthenon/8745/
My Email:tort@mindless.com
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Nice hat.
Your ArchNemesis: Well... I don't know that I have one.
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: Well, I would have to say flurtatious kisses, they can ruin just about anyone.
Marital Status: CommonLaw (gawd I hate that word)
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Happily female.
How did you find out about the Academy?: You sent me your address on ICQ.

Comments:
Well, I like your background. **laughing** Currently your page is mostly a bunch of links, I'm sure in a few days (after you have updated to frames) it will be much more entertaining. After all, NTM, your an interesting guy. Blessings of the Goddess. P>

Igor - 06/01/98 09:46:49
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Yes master!!
Your ArchNemesis: Katie Baldwin
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: My overwhelming looks (just kidding!!!)
Marital Status: Taken- yes he finally did it!
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Not now thanks
How did you find out about the Academy?: The address what written in red lipstick on my bathroom mirror

Comments:
Aidan, entschuldigung, Nine Turning Mirrors, dieses seite ist nicht sehr interressant aber ein bisschen unterhaltend. Endlich hat er, mich aus gefragt!! Bist du stolz? Eigentlich dieses seite ist sehr gut und ich mag es. Auf wiedersehen!!

Me... fuck my brains out - 06/01/98 08:27:10
My URL:http://wwww.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Arena/4721/
My Email:bourke@key.net.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: Would you like an improvement on your sex drive?
Your ArchNemesis: You, god damn it!
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: my cock... deadly, eh!
Marital Status: dreaming...
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Oh baby... come right now!
How did you find out about the Academy?: How the fuck do you think?

Comments:
Suck me off Aidan... I'm waiting for your friends page to abuse the shit out of me... oh, and where's guru Al's stuff??? Go and suck off Nathan, he's waiting anxiously!

jesus c. - 05/31/98 03:31:37
My URL:http://www.rotten.com
My Email:jesus@heaven.net
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: noone's a stranger, but I love you
Your ArchNemesis: bill gates - trying to take over my world
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: bible
Marital Status: single
How did you find out about the Academy?: david

Comments:
i love you but this homepage is a load of shit. whisper to me your dreams and desires and i will provide you with all that you need love, jesu.

Nine Turning Mirrors - 05/30/98 09:43:49
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Castle/2042
My Email:hennessy@key.net.au
Favourite thing to Say to Total Strangers: I want to cover you in tabasco sauce and lick it off...
Your ArchNemesis: That damned blue alien thing that keeps turning up
Favourite weapon of mass destruction: 20 megaton handheld nuclear warhead
Marital Status: Single, how about you?
Sex (M/F/Y/N): Very well then
How did you find out about the Academy?: Hmmm let me think oh wait, its my page!

Comments:
The guestbook will be chockers now...

Jarrad Davis - 05/30/98 06:15:32
My URL:http://haven't got one yet
My Email:ldavis@access.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Fuck Off

Comments:
Make it more exciting

Katie B - 05/30/98 06:11:04
My Email:baldwin4@hotkey.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Boo!!

Comments:


Nine Turning Mirrors - 05/30/98 02:09:23
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Castle/2042
My Email:hennessy@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Dirdihglrwe!!!@#123/123!@#!@#liwerguiiqi12e7827916123236169123123891QWEKjasdhasduihasU567E35234&&%^^()^#$

Comments:
Grr... Just short of 200 hits. I could scream! er...never mind

Kristy - 05/26/98 13:40:22
My Email:jaquies@hotmail.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: ....f**k me... :)

Comments:
I am a good friend of dave bourke andi was just cruising around his page and saw your link... i really like your page.. cya

Igor aka........... - 05/25/98 09:14:45
My Email:Faulminican Republic
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: kiss my Faulminican butt

Comments:
Aidan, me again. I read about the author again and one sentance sounds funny if you read it from my view. It says: I have brown eyes and hair. That's great, I like to know you have hair. Now what colour is it? Yeah I know it is brown. There I have boosted your ego by visiting your site-AGAIN. Where are the Spice girls. You promised me Spice girls. Well i'll get you for this nine turning mirrors..............

Igor aka Charlotte - 05/22/98 07:39:28
My Email:Armed Forces
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Rabid Snails are tasty

Comments:
I am the Armed Forces of the yFaulminikan Republic (silent y). We specialise in shonky loans which we hand out thanks to the cushy incomes we recieve from being South American drug Lords and lending exuberant somes of money to 3rd world countries. Thank y u for taking the time to visit our "Lucky Country". Population- 6.

Justiuras Master wizard of the redrobes - 05/20/98 22:53:22
My URL:http://www.tdstelme.net/~rollins/tower.html
My Email:djhjsfghsdhjghjadsgfhklasgdhbfhjgdhlasdgfhsdgafhasdgfhdslfgajkkkkkkkkkkkkkfghljfakgsdsdfjklglfjkdgdjlskgfjdg jksd
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: GO AWAY

Comments:
nice page needs work I am bussy so this is short

IGOR aka Charlotte - 05/15/98 23:55:57
My Email:you already know
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: I'm a hills hoist- what piece of garden apparatus are you?

Comments:
Aidan this has got to be the most fabulous page I have ever been to!!! NOT!! I haven't been to ABOUT THE AUTHOR yet so that should be a big thrill. Why can't you have something about the spice girls on here? That would attract the viewers! Has Jimbo writt n anymore crap? By the way it never got around to telling what number visitor I am so I'll have to go and check- see ya!

satan - 05/15/98 07:05:18
My Email:satan@lakeoffire.eternity.gov
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: see you soon

Comments:
sleep well

Lt.Cmdr. Solo - 05/15/98 03:14:50
My URL:http://www.thepentagon.com/lt.solo
My Email:lt.solo@thepentagon.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: buy me a canadain beer

Comments:
smoke pot, drink hard and have lots of sex. *salute*

peter andrews - 05/14/98 06:14:30
My Email:petera@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: you're weird

Comments:
Pretty cool. I finally found it and i'm very impressed. Thanks for your patience in helping me find it yada yada yada. Anyway, i like it. I'll tell Charlotte and others where it is !!! It's great!!

Ciaran Hennessy - 05/13/98 06:55:06
My URL:http://come.to/deathsmaw
My Email:ciaranh@au1.ibm.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: No

Comments:
Check out my new web address, couple of days till the new page goes up tho. Keep your eyes peeled

Thou - 05/09/98 06:24:21
My URL:http://cowsbreath.edu/
My Email:cowsbreath@moo.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Moo

Comments:
Just the other day I walked outside and ate some grass. Amongst that grass was the address for Aidan's page. I ate that too. It was rather disgusting... JUST LIKE THE PAGE!

Blood-drenched bunny kicker - 05/08/98 06:21:53
My URL:http://gore.com
My Email:blood@gore.com.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: DIE HEATHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comments:
Your dead, Mirrors you little prick!

Dr Bing - 04/28/98 07:03:14
My URL:http://www.ledahkoghgfsdsdf.com
My Email:bing@bong.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Reality is caused by a lack of drugs

Comments:
This page is lurvely, just freakin lurvely. Excuse me, i have a caller on the other line

Wanker man - 04/26/98 06:36:17
My URL:http://spoof.anal
My Email:cum@semen.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: oh that feels good

Comments:
Wanking is tops, why not take it up (it's free).

Jezza - 04/13/98 22:48:44
My URL:http://go-drive-your-jeep.com
My Email:jezzad@fastlink.com.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: I had roasted camel balls for dinner last night

Comments:
Hah! Civilisation 1 is cool, somwhow i think i haven't play Civ 2, maybe i dont care, maybe PC's eat cock, maybe your page stinks, i'm not sure!

Jimbo the critic - 04/12/98 08:48:22
My Email:hennessy@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Aidan roots sheep

Comments:
This page is in no way brighter, however it does load faster. In my opionion, get fucked!

Blinky and Dan - 04/02/98 07:00:21
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: thou shall rot in hell

Comments:
you suck by the way, we typed this at south high

Ciaran Hennessy - 03/30/98 04:54:00
My Email:ciaranh@au1.ibm.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: I work for IBM. Suck Shit

Comments:
Very nice brother of mine. I like your graphics. YOu have put a lot of work into it. Do something else for god sake now. Get some bloody sun.

Bryan "Avatar" Hoover - 03/27/98 00:19:58
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Realm/2062
My Email:avatar485@hotmail.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: BOO!

Comments:
You really need to fix your color scheme, some of the pages are totally unreadable. Other than that, Nice Page!

Aidan Hennessy - 03/20/98 21:21:43
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Castle/2042
My Email:hennessy@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: youre ugly

Comments:
here i am again, signing my own book. how sad

Ezekiel Hernandez - 03/11/98 03:31:18
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Uhh, Hmm... I'M WEEIIRD!!!

Comments:
civiliZation II kicKs aSS, doesn't it? guess what, i'm WEIRD, but you are too.

Dave - 02/15/98 04:54:59
My URL:http://usuck.com
My Email:bourke@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: fuck off

Comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHA... hmmm... jddgfdfkglhdfg

jimbo - 02/10/98 08:59:21
My Email:james1@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: get rooted

Comments:
This page looks like a dog crapped on it . What sort of idiot has anything to to with a d & d anyway.

Bob Roberts - 02/06/98 23:29:15
My URL:http://www.lala.com
My Email:blahblah@hotmail.com
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: Lick my inner thigh

Comments:
Your a legend. Bloody excellent page6296295

Aidan Hennessy - 01/10/98 04:53:49
My URL:http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/Castle/2042
My Email:hennessy@key.net.au
Favorite Thing to Say to Total Strangers: dyke me

Comments:
cool page